


broken boys

by darling_clementine



Category: The Walking Dead (Telltale Video Game)
Genre: Episode 2, F/M, clementine is in deep thought, lightly edited sry, she really loves AJ, we need more clouis in our lives
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-10-30
Updated: 2018-10-30
Packaged: 2019-08-09 22:14:07
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,239
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/16457996
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/darling_clementine/pseuds/darling_clementine
Summary: When AJ shoots Marlon, it brings up a lot of memories for Clementine. She's sad it happened, but she's angrier that she empathizes completely.





	broken boys

**Author's Note:**

> This takes place directly after Episode 1. This is the first time I've written fanfiction but I've been feeling very inspired by my love of Clouis!!!  
> this story turned into exploring what Clementine was thinking during the aftermath of Marlon's death. There's a littleeee bit of Clouis if you squint. Hopefully, I've laid down sufficient groundwork to continue on an build upon that hahaha.  
> If the formatting is messed up, please blame A03 for refusing to generate a preview for me.

All she can see is blood.

  
When she looks down at her hands or averts her gaze slightly to the pool of it just below her. It’s slipping off of a tendril of her hair, viscous crimson is warming her hands.  
It’s seeping out of the void in the centre of Marlon’s forehead, pooling around his fallen body. She’s transfixed with the sight of it, another life lost. This time it’s not caused by her hands, at least not directly.

  
Sometimes, she thinks blood is all she knows. It’s familiar – maybe even comforting in a sick sense. In a way, it has come to signify the end of something. Ever since that day her babysitter Sandra had turned and Lee took care of her. It had been a string of bodies after – Herschel’s son, Doug, Carley, Kenny, Duck, Kaatja, Lee. There were more, of course, many more. When she acknowledges that, another memory flutters below the surface of her consciousness. The man at the dairy that Lee had slowly beat to death, purpling and swelling his face into something unrecognizable.

  
Was this the way of the world now? Humans are as much a threat as walkers, she’s had to contend with that fact. She’s seen too many executions. Lily punishing Carley for cruel words. Javier avenging his niece, slaughtering both Max and Badger. Mariana too, just a little girl much like herself, mouth spread in glee over the sight of a chocolate bar.

  
Herself. A stranger in a dimly lit room. She had gone with him, desperate to find her parents, naively believing he was good. In return, he had locked her up, claimed that finding them was too dangerous. She had a new family that would protect her better than Lee ever could, he assured her. Clementine could see right away, however, that he was fervently willing his words to be true. They weren’t. He hardly believed them himself. When she cried, he snapped. Her parents, he taunted in retaliation, were _dead_. In response, she cried harder and cursed herself for going with him, for her naïve hope of a reunion with her parents.

  
Then when Lee had come Clementine watched with sickened dread as he struggled with the stranger. Pale gnarled hands grasping at his throat, squeezing harder and harder. She watched, paralyzed until fear bubbled in her chest and she blindly dove for the gun. Both of her hands thrust forward, pistol tightly clasped between them. _Please let it be over._ A shot rang out. She didn’t tremble as she pulled the trigger- she saved that for after.

  
She observes AJ now, hands outstretched in the same position. She knows, intuitively that he’s gripped with the same terror that she once was. That clawing fear that so easily gives rise to desperation, she’s ashamed he’s ever had to feel that way.  
She’s also ashamed, that she let it get this far. If she had taught him better- loved him more fiercely – maybe he would know it didn’t have to be this way.

  
Clementine is floundering, although no one can see. The kids are caught up in their grief and for some, their swelling anger.  
Louis is caught between the two emotions. Even still, he’s the first to speak.

  
_You shot him. He’s dead._ He’s stating the obvious- because how else is he supposed to make sense of the fact that his best friend is gone?

  
Clementine knows that he loved him. They had been friends for a very long time. She thinks of the picture of the two little boys, arms slung across each other. The wide smiles, missing teeth. It was a happier time. Most likely, Marlon was the only one that has ever looked out for Louis. The only one that had truly appreciated him. She’s been here for a short time but she sees it. The way most of the kids look at Louis. Sometimes amused, most of the time exasperated. They don’t recognize that he’s always trying to make people happy. They miss the glum twist of his mouth when he thinks no one is looking.

  
Clementine doesn’t, couldn’t even if she wanted to. She resolves to do whatever she can to make it up to him. Louis is an anomaly in a world as fucked up as this one. It’s a miracle that he spends so much time smiling and joking. She envies him for that, but mostly she feels a deep appreciation. Something warm and light always seems to spread throughout her chest when she sees him smile. It really is like he gives a piece of himself to everyone. He imbues them with his energy, makes Clementine feel a little bit lighter. 

When she’s feeling bitter she tells herself that the kids at the school have had it easy. That’s not entirely true, however.  
The kids here have experienced tragedy to some extent, most notably the loss of Tennessee’s sisters.

  
But even then, Marlon has shielded them from the brunt of the darkness. Although he had offered up the twins and discarded of them like unwanted dolls - Clementine is mature enough to admit that he did it to protect the rest of them. He wasn’t lying about that. He protected them from the truth and from the darkest parts of himself until he couldn’t anymore.

  
_Still._ The raiders were satisfied with two girls? Two girls when there were plenty of boys at the school ripe for the picking? It doesn’t bode well for the twins, she’s sure. She’s bolstered by anger when she thinks about it.

  
She directs her anger toward Louis amidst his accusations. ‘’ Fuck you Louis! He’s a little kid, so shut your fucking mouth!’’ This doesn’t excuse what AJ did, not by a long shot. It’s a hollow sentiment but it’s all she’s got. She feels better for a brief moment until she eyes the dark look on Louis’ face.

  
Violet gets between them now, practically snarling while her cleaver glints under the moon’s rays. The little girl inside Clementine loves her at this moment, can’t think of the last time someone truly defended her.

  
When Violet urges her to take AJ inside, she obeys unthinkingly. She walks on, ignoring Louis’ angry words. When Mitch confronts her and AJ, she disarms him swiftly. As sorry as she is, she can’t afford to have anyone in the school think it will end well if they choose to mess with her.

  
She strokes AJ’s hair until he falls asleep that night. Then she grapples with her feelings, her shame, disappointment and guilt. _It will be easier_ , she thinks, _if we pack up and leave_. However, the world outside is far more dangerous. She has nothing to fear here – not anymore. She and AJ have proven to be the biggest threats in this school.  
These kids are _good_. Despite Mitch’s posturing, she knows he won’t harm her. She and AJ are still safer here, despite the justified anger of the group.

  
That night, she falls asleep to the rhythm of AJ’s soft breathing. He is unburdened in his sleep. He doesn’t look one bit like a boy that just committed murder. She supposes wryly, that no one has ever taken her for a murderer at first glance, either.

  
It’s an uneasy sleep and she startles awake often. If she strains her ears, she can hear Louis’ low sobbing outside.

  
Clementine was mistaken earlier, blood isn’t what’s familiar. Death is.

 

**Author's Note:**

> I have a lot of mixed feelings about Marlon's death but I think above all Clementine and I love AJ. and Louis. And Violet. 
> 
> I kind of want to do another chapter and wrap up episode 2 ??? we shall see  
> I'm open to suggestions! I've kind of just been trolling the archive looking for Clouis fic and decided to contribute.  
> I don't know how everyone in this fandom writes so well. buuuuut if there is something someone wants me to write (imagine???), I am happy to create a one-shot
> 
> I also have 1/2 of a Clouis AU in the works, heavily inspired by that 'Queen Clem' line. I actually paused working on it because I had more thoughts for this hahaha. I'm thinking I might just keep it for myself unless someone else is interested.


End file.
